Our piece of miracle

It was last year September 29, 2014, my mom's 10th death anniversary that I missed my period. Though I was hesitant to take the pregnancy test I was also hoping that the long wait was finally over and our prayers has been answered. And it was!

I took this test on Oct 1, 2014

Today we are celebrating 2 special occasions, my mom's death anniversary and my son Julian's 4th month birthday.

Julian celebrating his 4th month birthday

In this life we definitely need to have a stronger faith in Him that our prayers will be answered not in our time but in His own perfect time. Miracles happen every day open up your hearts to receive it!

My Baby Love

He is my "inaanak" (godson) and we fondly call him "bun" he used to have those bun-like cheeks when he was still a baby. This week we had a fun priceless bonding moments watching his favorite cartoon character, Mickey Mouse!

He used to be this cutie little angel 

And Ninang used to play with you, tossing you and you loved it

And time just flew so fast...

Mimicking Mickey Mouse even the voice 

Smiling for Ninang even if he is busy with his Kindle

And then he found this silicone bra padding placed it on his head while telling me,
 "Mickey Mouse ears!" LOL

Whenever I'm sweeping the floor he walks to me and will say "Let me do it"
Child labor??? LOL

And my little Bun got tired and slept in his "CAR" that was he said.
I tried to transfer him in the bed but he woke up and said I want to sleep here... Priceless!

“A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on.” 
― Carl Sandburg

You are my Superman

I woke up and remember it is Father's day. Yes, since I live now far away from my Tatay I just decided to make a video as gift. Budget friendly indeed! (hahaha!) 

I opened  my computer gathered some old photos of my father and uncles. I dedicated some 4 hours for this video and it made me happy I hope my father and my handsome uncles will like this simple yet a priceless gift. 

"I was raised, loved, and nurtured by a great man whom I called Tatay. He has shown the best form of kindness. Every day I thank God for being his daughter and I pray to God to guide me to be just like him." 

New Hope after Death

We all know that death is the last page of our book of life. And death of a loved one is one of the most painful to get through. Some were taken in a snap and the others grieve in suffering of disease. Though any of these, we all caught unprepared to let them go.

My mother died of ovarian cancer she battled with the disease for 2 years. I could still remember clearly the last hour I locked myself inside the comfort room my tummy was aching terribly because of great stress. Somebody from my family knocked on the door and told me that my mom wanted to talk to me.

Sad place, the final resting place for those who left us and a painful
remembrance that they are not coming back.
Location: Himlayang Pilipino, Quezon City Philippines

I went out and stood on the side of her bed, my mom looked at me with tears rolling down her cheeks, she was too weak to utter any word and I said, “Mommy, its ok sleep now and go home to heaven.” I never said this during her battle because I was trying to give her strength to continue fighting.  As she closed her eyes our family knew that it was the end of it. My mom left us that morning and we were forced to accept it as winning the battle than thinking we lost it.

My mom won because she accepted cancer and surrendered her fate to God. She died but she got her freedom from pain and suffering. Our family kept her spirit burning inside us as we pray that she left this world for a better place. She found her peace and has received an eternal life in God’s kingdom.

But we could look at this place with HOPE that our loved ones left for a better place.
Death brings eternal life to those who believe in Christ's kingdom.
Location: Himlayang Pilipino, Quezon City Philippines

And for us, who lost a loved one hold on to this verse from the bible;

“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.” - Psalm 23:4

For my SuperTATAY

Dearest Tatay,

I am very happy with my married life. God blessed me with a loving and wonderful husband. But there are still times I wish I can go back being your baby girl... I terribly miss our movie marathons, how you say, “Ang sarap ng luto mo Anak!” (kahit parang bola lang minsan), I miss our morning jogging, I miss our trips to thrift stores, I miss everything of you Tatay. Miles away from you is not easy at all. 

Yesterday, we attended church service at Every Nation and they shared some clips from the movie “Courageous”, it’s about four men who are serving as law enforcement officers yet find it hard to face and tackle the real meaning of, fatherhood. All the father’s were given a copy of The Father’s Resolution, and as I read it, you exactly did all what was mentioned a father should do to fulfill his duties.

Tatay, we are so blessed to have you. I have witnessed how you loved Mommy dearly and dedicated your life until her last breath. You were very hurt to see her go but you stood strongly for us. Until now it still amazes me how you covered your pain with strength so that it will be easier for us to accept and let her go. You brought us up with God’s words in our hearts. Your love gave us the right direction in life. Your faith in God gave us strength to accept the trials and face it through prayers.

Your life reflects what a father should be. Your kindness to all the people around you makes me so proud being your daughter. Tatay, thank you for the great love that you have showered us, this same love made me a complete and better person. Soon, I promise you will be a happy grandpa! But for now, let me savor the moments being your baby girl...  

I love you Tatay! Happy Father’s Day

To my Grandfather and Uncles who are Super TATAYS as well, I love you all! 

It's Mommy's Day

I bought an expensive bouquet of red roses, beautifully arranged I guess the most beautiful I ever got for you Mommy. I was trying very hard to come up with something very special, something that I have never given you and the best that I could ever give you.

I said, “Happy Mother’s Day Mom! This is for the Mother’s day that I am not going to spend with you. I love you so much!”

Unfortunately it wasn’t Mother’s Day at all but rather it was your wake. Eight long years have passed and still that speech I made in front of our families and friends was still very fresh in my mind. I guess still painful for the very reason I could have given you more Mom, especially now that I earn my own money and I can take you out and treat you for a relaxing spa massage, shopping, movie date, dinner, but these moments will just be an imagination. You left us so early and I will trade anything just to have one Mother’s Day with you…

Last night, me and my husband went to a friend’s birthday party. We took a cab on our way to their house and it happened we met with a nice taxi driver. He started sharing a story of the old lady who took the ride before us. He said, the old lady got five children her husband who passed away 3 years ago didn’t work as the children were growing up leaving her the sole responsibility to raise the family.

And now, this old mother who brought out children to this world and have given them a good life, a better future, and love them unconditionally refused to take care of her in her old age. She even told the taxi driver that one of her daughters treated her like a maid. The old lady said it will be Mother’s day tomorrow and admitted that not a single instance that she could recall that her children remembered her for this special day dedicated for mothers.

As the taxi driver has said, "I am very angry with these people who got a good paying job, nice house, nice cars, but don't have the heart to love their own mothers, simply don't deserve any respect at all." 

Irony of life, I lost a mom but I am willing to trade anything to spend just one day with her but I believe there were also children who has mothers, fathers who were in their last years of their lives who were just treated badly and worst, being totally forgotten.

We were born to this world by a MOTHER, and these women were God’s angels to nurture and love each one of us.They deserve our love and respect in return. Their sacrifices were unconditionally and they should be recognized.

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!

A step forward to a new Role

A month ago I started to work again after being a housewife for a year. Staying at home was a fulfillment for me that I was able to give my full attention to my husband. I learned to cook different dishes, I became meticulous with my laundry, I had time to blog and I had fun discovering that I can bake cupcakes straight from the box hahaha!

This job is actually a blessing from heaven! One year of applying for different jobs, passing hundreds of resume to companies I cannot even recall now, thinking of paying $3,000 to an employment agency just to help me find a job made me feel a bit depressed. But of course during those low moments my husband tried reminding me to just have faith in God that in His own time our prayers will be granted.

True enough I got a job and my work pass here in Singapore was approved easily.  I am very fortunate that I have a very nice collegues at work and my bosses are very nice as well. With this new career I got a chance to visit Malaysia and see Petronas Tower, such a beauty! 

 Petronas Tower, a beauty that made me super EXCITED!

A perfect view by our hotel window

Lucky to have lunch just beneath Petronas Tower

I met with brand managers of different companies in Kuala Lumpur and all of them were very warm and welcoming. Me and my bosses stayed at a very chic hotel and in my 3-day stay I didn’t spend anything. Simply an amazing blessing from God. And next week I will be visiting Manila all expense paid meaning FREE! Sometimes best things in life are still officially up for grabs! Praise God!

 

Malaysia traffic

 GSK Malaysia

 Nestle Malaysia

I’m so happy for this new career, trying to enjoy every perks that come along with it but at the end of the day I go back to my most important role in this life, a WIFE… 

(To my friends and families who helped me with my Manila meetings, my BIGGEST THANKS!!!)

Remembering Lolo Gerry

LOLO and the little ME

At five years old my mornings were greeted with AM radio station and with the sound of you scrubbing the floor with your bunot (coconut husk used for polishing wooden floors). I have known you as the BOSS of your barbershop. Your senior citizen barkadas were starting to arrive by 8 am for your daily dose of men's chikahan. You were always wearing your white v-neck Crispa shirt and goes for a ride on your red vintage bike for your morning exercise. You dropped me and picked me up at school everyday. Asked me to take a nap at 1 pm after lunch. In the afternoon, you let me play in front of the shop with my playmates. At 6 in the evening we go home and have supper. We have two TV's one was colored and the other one was black and white. You loved watching PBA basketball but I used to cry because I wanted to watch my kiddie shows in the colored TV so you ended up watching at the old black and white TV. I believed that at five I was the boss being your first apo (grandchild). Every night I slept in the middle between you and Lola. My childhood was indeed PERFECT and it's because of you and Lola Ely. 

My cousin Paolo with Lolo 

Lolo, I miss you terribly! I miss your unending stories of Japanese era! I know that when I was 23, you asked me when I am getting married because you want to see your great grandchild from me and I could still remember what you said, "Siguro pagkatapos 'nun pagnakita ko na yung magiging anak mo pwede na akong mamatay." (I think when I get to see your baby I can go.) When I got married I was thinking of you because I was so sure that you're going to be the most excited one. 

My cousin May with LOLO

My cousin Nadine with Lola Ely and Lolo Gerry

We have many reasons to miss you, your music, your sweetness and your love... You were a great man, a great father, a loving husband, and a sweet grandfather. But most of all, for each one of us you're an ANGEL who filled our lives with wonderful memories. WE LOVE YOU LOLO! 

Lolo and Lola's priceless treasure...US!

From my father's blog about Lolo
http://superlolongpinoy.wordpress.com/?s=iskilar

How to be HAPPY

This morning I had a lunch date with Diana, one of my few good friends here in Singapore. She treated me with a sumptuous meal that I never tasted before, a bowl of Fried wanton noodle! So good that I will definitely eat it again.

Changi City Point Mall, Singapore

Fried wonton noodles

Ice Lemon Tea

Then we shared a bunch of stories, she laughed so hard while I narrated my long funny love story with my husband. Honestly it sounds hilarious now but during that time I literally cried a bucket to fight for our relationship and sometimes we both still wonder how we managed to overcome everything! Praise God for blessing us a wonderful marriage!

We did a little shopping then we went home then I received a text message that gave me a moment to say, "awwww" and may I quote what Diana said, “I think you can write in your blog about you being a positive person and what comes to your mind because your energy is captivating and can help others to have a positive outlook in life."

And so here I am trying to share that energy though I’m not so sure how to put it in words. Well, let me start with, I LOVE MY LIFE! Every morning I wake up with a smile on my face for the very reason that I know I’m alive and I have another day to live. We know that not everyone is lucky to wake up in the morning. This may sound a simple reason but it gives me a great feeling! Another morning means I have another day, another chance with my husband, with my family and friends. I can do a lot of things and I can start it off with a cup of coffee!

THANK YOU LORD FOR THE BLESSINGS! After breakfast I stop for awhile right after I checked  my twitter account, facebook, and instagram’s likes and messages. I allot a couple of minutes to think about what I have right now, like a wonderful husband who kisses me and greets me, "Good Morning Sweetheart!" And that is every single morning! Then I remember my mom’s last days she said knowing that it could be your last day makes you more appreciative of what is around you and I practice this every day. I look outside seeing not only a sky but a clear blue sky with a radiant shinning sun!

Parking Lot at Expo Singapore

I look at the flowers not just flowers but how colorful and how beautiful the flowers are! I breathe and I imagine every organ of my body is functioning well! Enough reasons to smile and look forward to what this day may bring. GOD is so wonderful for giving us an amazing world to live in.

Lastly, I SHARE LOVE by saying I LOVE YOU! I say it countless times to my husband and whenever I have a chance to talk to my Tatay (dad), my sisters, my grandma, everyone! I just want them to know how I feel. I remember my mom saying that when you know that you are dying you will do everything to make up for the lost times and regret the times you didn’t even utter the words “I Love You.” I am sure that I don’t want to regret it someday but nevertheless make every moment counts. Just like in my favorite movie, MY BESTFRIEND’s WEDDING, “If you love someone you say it, you say it right then, out loud. Otherwise the moment just passes you by.” Saying I love you isn’t hard to do let it out and you will feel every thing will turn positive.

Orchard Central, Singapore

Life isn’t perfect but it is in our hands to make things right for us. Let go of the NEGATIVE feelings by not pushing it away but by filling your heart with the POSITIVE ones like happiness and love through good memories. Don’t chase what you don’t have or can’t have it will just frustrates you rather cherish what’s infront of you. ASK GOD and CLAIM that in HIS own time if its really yours the answers will come, but if not something far better than you expect is going to happen in your life.

It is like a two-way street LEFT and RIGHT, 

just like POSITIVE and NEGATIVE

now take your pick which way you want.

I am sharing this because I’ve been there…darkest, lowest, loneliest, moment of my life but God is real He never left me but I AM TELLING YOU, HE rearranged my life far better than what I have imagined my life to be. LIVE LIFE through your personal HAPPINESS, THANKSGIVING, and LOVE! 

I took all the pictures this morning using my Iphone4S, 
except our Prenup photo (by Eric Tan) 

Location: Changi City Point Mall, and around Expo

Dear God

I spent days trying to reflect on the past year, 2011. Honestly, looking back at that year all I could remember was you kept me under your care and you showered my life with MIRACLES!

Lord, it was January of last year just after our Christian wedding in the Philippines when my sister Jessel had an operation and the cyst taken out from her was malignant. I remember I was shaking I felt cold as ice as she broke the news through a phone call she was at the hospital and just got the sad diagnosis from her doctor. My sister’s voice was calmed and composed she said, “Ate, I am ok I’ll just see you at the house.” At that point, what we went through with my Mom’s battle with cancer kept running into my mind and I said, “Lord, not again.” I looked at my father standing beside me he looked worried he seemed as if he couldn’t grasp the right words to say or what to think as of the moment but I saw in his eyes what he wanted to do and it was to PRAY! Suddenly, I felt ashamed because how can I be scared then, I knew how you took in control of our lives when my Mom was sick. Lord, in the lowest, darkest, saddest hour of our family losing my Mom you were there. And I clearly remember at that very moment I took my faith back and held it tightly and I trusted your plans for Jessel and for our family.

It was January of last year, Jessel was diagnosed with a malignant tumor and 6 months after, she was declared “CLEAN and FREE from any malignancy.” She was completely healed and Lord thank you we didn’t even spend a dime for her hospital bills. You have taken care of everything. Just like what the Pastor in our church said last week, “When God send trials, accept it with all your heart trust Him because He wanted you to learn something from it and then PROPHESIZE…SHARE the good news.”

My sister Jessel healthy and happy
celebrating God's gift of life (photo taken last Christmas 2011)

2011 was the first year I spent with my husband. Lord, you knew our 19 year-old love story, from childhood sweethearts, to teenage love team, until we became husband and wife. We even got through a long distance love affair for 1 year and 8 months before settling down it was not that easy for the two of us we even almost broke up but you heard our prayers and kept us holding on.

Priceless Gift I got from the Lord, my husband!

Last year was a great year for us, thank you Lord for blessing me a wonderful husband and a happy marriage. Everyday was filled with love and laughter. Looking back at the trials when we were still boyfriend and girlfriend seemed to be out of this world and seeing how we are right now just takes my breath away and say, “Praise you God for changing our lives. For planning our lives far better than what we have imagined our lives to be.”

Lastly, I have been searching and applying for job for almost a year now. Every now and then I got so depressed of not finding one my husband even asked me to pray and wait. But just like my Mom always tells me when she was still alive, “Ask and it will be given to you, seek and you will find, knock and the door will be opened to you.” Lord, thank you true enough at your own perfect time I got a call last December 30 and I got a job! A job far better than I expected.

Lord, I praise and thank you for the countless miracles that you showered my life. The year 2011 was indeed I claimed to be my year. I saw your blessings unfolded one after another. It was an overwhelming year. As I face 2012 together with my husband, please continue to help us grow closer to you. May we always choose your will for our lives. May this year be our year in serving You. Lord, you know our heart desires we need your blessing and we need your divine guidance. All these I ask in your Mighty Name! 

                                                                                                                         Amen

Colors of Christmas

What is Christmas?  

It is tenderness for the past, courage for the present, hope for the future.  It is a fervent wish that every cup may overflow with blessings rich and eternal, and that every path may lead to peace.  

~Agnes M. Pahro

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree:  

the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other.  ~Burton Hillis

This is the message of Christmas:  We are never alone.  ~Taylor Caldwell

Perhaps the best Yuletide decoration is being wreathed in smiles.

Our hearts grow tender with childhood memories and love of kindred, and we are better throughout the year for having, in spirit, become a child again at Christmas-time. 

 ~Laura Ingalls Wilder

Christmas is forever, not for just one day,
for loving, sharing, giving, are not to put away
like bells and lights and tinsel, in some box upon a shelf.
The good you do for others is good you do yourself...
~Norman Wesley Brooks, "Let Every Day Be Christmas," 1976

Thanks everyone for the gifts definitely add some more colors to my Christmas!